Peter Schroeder
 

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29.09.2020

Nikolaus und der colorektale Winkel

Liebe Freunde!

Sie haben/Ihr habt sicher als ständige Leser meiner Aufsätze festgestellt, dass ich einen gewissen Hang zum Schwarz-Weißen habe, wenn ich persönlich auch der Meinung bin, dass Schwarz-Weiß sich auf meine Leidenschaft für Photographie bezieht. Bei diesem  Beitrag möchte ich eine  Aus-nahme von der Regel machen und ein Farb-Foto hinzufügen.

Es ist schon davon die Rede gewesen, dass der neue, allerdings schon seit fünf Jahren bestehende Lebensabschnitt nach frischen Zielen verlangt. Eines davon ergab sich eher zufällig, nämlich durch den Kellerfund eines Damen-Rennrades. Das wurde, nach einigen wenigen Erhaltungsmaßnahmen,  unerwarteterweise zur Leidenschaft und hatte Folgekosten, weil ich mein Tourenfahrrad durch ein Rennrad ergänzt habe.

Seitdem sind uns Umrundungen des Tegernsees am frühen Sonntagmorgen, bayerische Voralpenhü-gel  am Abend und die toskanische Landschaft von Normalnull auf  knapp 300 Meter Meereshöhe unseres Ferienortes vertraute Beschäftigungen und haben zu meiner Freude entsprechende Jogging-runden abgelöst. In der Toskana ist es weitaus weniger gefährlich als rund um den Tegernsee, wo das Rennrad noch einigermaßen fremd ist und zur Ich-Werdung wenig beiträgt. Dabei ließe sich unter dem 5-Sterne Hotel-Giebel beim Aperitif doch herrlich von der der 21-Gang sequentiellen Schaltung, von den Zähnen der Kettenblätter schwärmen - haben Sie/habt ihr schon einmal einen Porsche-Fahrer gesehen, der entsprechendes Wissen zu seinem Gefährt besitzt oder auch nur weiß, warum das Zündschloss links des Lenkrades angebracht ist.

Zumeist sind wir schon auf dem Rückweg, wenn andere zweirädrige Verkehrsteilnehmer plötzlich und in stetig zunehmender Zahl, vor allem bei gleißendem Sonnenschein auf dem Asphalt auftau-chen.

Wenn ich solche sehe, fällt mir immer kolorektale Winkel ein. Wer wissen möchte, was es mit dem Winkel auf sich hat, der könnte das Buch von Giulia Enders Darm mit Charme lesen. Dort wird von einer Untersuchung berichtet, in der herausgefunden wurde, dass der Stuhlgang im Sitzen durch-schnittlich 130 Sekunden benötigt , während der Stuhlgang in der Hocke nur 50 Sekunden dauer-te. Insofern fand ich die Bestimmung der Sitzhöhe unserer neuen Toilette mit Zollstock und der Frage, ob 40,41 oder 42 cm  kommod seien, berechtigt.

Sitzhöhe und Winkel bringen mich jetzt ohne Umwege zum Pedelec.  Da ich nicht weiß, ob Sie/Ihr zu den Pedelec-Nutzern gehören/gehört - vom ciclista möchte ich nicht sprechen - laufe ich Gefahr, es mit dem einen oder der anderen zu verderben, denn die in vielen Berufsjahren geübte klinische Beobachtungsgabe erlaubt den Schluss, dass ein hoher BMI, sagen wir so um die 33-35 eine Grund-voraussetzung für ein Pedelec ist. Ich bin, auch wenn meine Frau anderer Meinung ist, normalge-wichtig, habe aber das Glück, dass ab einem gewissen Alter der BMI einen Korrekturfaktor hat.

Die Sitzhaltung auf dem Pedelec entspricht dem kolorektalen Winkel, der für die 130 Sekunden verantwortlich ist. Deswegen war es mir überhaupt aufgefallen. Dass wir zum Erreichen unseres Ausflugs-Schnittes, der regelmäßig jenseits der 25km/h Marke (der erlaubten Geschwindigkeit eines Pedelecs) liegt, trotz der 21 Gänge mehr treten müssen als der Pedelec-Pilot, ist uns auch aufgefal-len. Die dritte Beobachtung sind oft geblähte Nüstern und aufgerissene Augen, die psychologisch wohl mit Schreck verbunden sind ( obwohl mir eine solche Beobachtung und Verquickung  als Ex-Chirurg nicht zusteht), der Schreck, dass ohne eigenes Zutun der Weidezaun geradezu vorbeifliegt.

Wenn wir ein solches Paar, selbst in einiger Entfernung, vor uns auftauchen sehen, genügt ein in langen Ehejahren geübter Blick der non-verbalen Kommunikation: die knacken wir. Ein kleines Ziel. Als ich als Chefarzt noch beruflich mit dem kolorektalen Winkel beschäftigt war, habe ich in vielen Coaching-Seminaren lernen müssen, dass das Erreichen kleiner Ziele das Grosse und Ganze gelingen lässt. So gibt es auf einer Radtour viele kleine solcher Ziele, die, wenn sie in die Gesundheitsseite der Techniker-Krankenkasse eingegeben wird, in eine längere Lebenserwartung münden.

Über die Öko-Bilanz eines Pedelecs möchte ich nicht richten, weil es mir als Kampf gegen Wind-mühlenflügel vorkommt, zu argumentieren,  dass Muskelkraft sinnvoller ist als ein Elektromotor, zumindest  im Rahmen der Freizeitbeschäftigung.

Als ich am Dienstagnachmittag bei einer Tasse Darjeeling mit Sahnewölkchen und den letzten Kru-men von Dunhills Royal Yacht Club Tabak über diese Zeilen nachdachte, erschien der Weihnachts-mann in  Begleitung einer jungen Dame. Mir kam das an einem Septembertag ungewöhnlich vor. Noch ungewöhnlicher waren die E-Scooter, mit denen beide unterwegs waren. Aber gut, auch die-ser Beruf muss sich dem Klimawandel stellen und das gewohnte Transportmittel, der Schlitten, hat vermutlich nur  eine Zukunft im Verkehrsmuseum. Auch ist es anzuerkennen, dass der meist doch ältere Weihnachtsmann dem Rat der Verkehrssicherheitsexperten folgt, rechtzeitig mit der Einge-wöhnung an ein solches Transportmittel zu beginnen.

Für Weihnachtsgrüsse erscheint es mir dennoch  zu früh.

Peter Schroeder - 12:09 @ Allgemein, Motorsport, Gesellschaft | 212 Kommentare

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